i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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