Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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