Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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