yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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