Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
