You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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