that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize