Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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