super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
