Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
The beers last night were like the tears from god
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
