Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
