smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
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