Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
