I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
