I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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