if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Randomize
