Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize