i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
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