And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
