we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
