i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
