I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
