party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
