I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
