We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
