We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize