'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
