she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
