Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
