yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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