he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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