I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
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