Your tits are I can't wait for
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize