yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
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