Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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