I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
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it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
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Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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