Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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