I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
