haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
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