It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
