apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
