drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
