Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
The uberlube is also flammable
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
