My hair reeks of homosexuality.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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