Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
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