How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Randomize
