I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
Randomize