I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
