Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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