i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
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