It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
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I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Randomize