hotel room ftw
I got chris browned last night
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Randomize
